Insecurities and Relationships: Is it Normal?

in·se·cu·ri·ty
ˌinsəˈkyo͝orədē/
noun
 uncertainty or anxiety about oneself; lack of confidence.


Do insecurities and relationships go hand and hand? Is it normal while in a relationship to start questioning yourself more, start questioning your partner, and start to not believe in yourself like you did before you met them?

I don’t think a healthy relationship is supposed to be like this… but so many people tend to be in relationships that are exactly like this.

Why do we stay in relationships where we constantly feel insecure?

The beginning of the relationship is wonderful because it’s the honeymoon stage, but as the time passes it may start to get worse. Maybe you start fighting more, maybe you start to question the future, maybe you start to feel really insecure about yourself, but you end up staying with them, meanwhile you are miserable as ever. Why?

I think many of us are scared to be alone, were scared of the unknown, and were scared we’re never going to find someone who makes us happy. Instead of waiting to get into a relationship or ending the relationship you are currently in, you either settle for just about anyone, or you stay in the relationship that makes you miserable.

I have dated a few people…but as I have gotten older I have noticed I have become more picky on who I date, and I won’t just settle for anyone that comes around, and I think that is because I have become more secure with myself.

Think about it this way… in high school, most of those relationships had loads of problems and fizzled out. Is it because you weren’t compatible? Is it because the sex wasn’t good? Or was it because you were both insecure, trying to find yourself and rather than working on your issues, you decided to avoid them and date someone and hope that will make you happy? At first it did, at first it was amazing, but as the months progressed things started getting worse.

As you get older, you hopefully start to feel more secure in your own skin,  and start to believe in yourself more. You start to be happy being alone, rather than trying to find someone to make you happy. You start to realize your self worth and decide that you would rather be alone, and have some lonely moments than be with someone who doesn’t make you happy.

I think once you’re happy in your own skin, you can then be happy with another person.

The person you are with should make you feel amazing about yourself, and the last thing you should feel is insecure. If you feel insecure around your partner, you’re probably with the wrong person.

Remember, the right person is out there, and the right person will make you feel great. They will bring you up, and not down. They should be your best friend. They should be someone you share everything with. They should be the person you feel the most comfortable around. They should be your rock.

Don’t settle for just anyone, because you would rather be with someone, than be alone.

True love removes all insecurities.

If you are insecure in your relationship, that’s a clear sign that some love is missing.

Love with everything or let it go.

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