How Pursuing My Goals Showed Me Who My Real Friends Are

We’ve all been in a rut, that we think we’re never going to get out of, whether it be regarding our finances, our relationships, our body, our job, our friendships etc.. If you’re unhappy with your lifestyle, or the way you look, or you want to make a change, go for it. What’s stopping you? What’s stopping you from being happy? The only thing that is stopping you is yourself. If you want to get ripped, do it! If you want to travel the world, make it happen! If you want to buy a house, start saving!  If you want to go back to school, apply! If you want to pay off your debt, start saving! You can do anything you set your mind to, it’s just the initial first step that’s difficult.

Some people decide to stay in this rut and accept that this is what their life is, and constantly stay miserable, when others decide to do something about it.

The turning point where one decides to change how they live their life, is when many magical and disappointing things happen.

Lets start with the magical things that happen.

1) I find, when we set a goal and stick with it, our mood changes drastically. I started a fitness journey in December of 2015, and I haven’t looked back since. I still have my bad days, but overall I am a much happier person. I don’t know if it’s because of all the adrenaline and endorphin’s running through my body, or if it’s because I am accomplishing a goal of mine. Regardless of which one it is, I genuinely feel happier.

2) People start to notice a change. Having people come up to you/comment on your pictures/statuses and say “You look amazing”, or “you seem so happy”, etc. is an amazing feeling. When you have positive people in your life confirming that the choices you have made are positive, makes you feel that much better, and it helps you keep pushing yourself, even on your off days.

No one said it would be easy!

3) This one is very important to me, and I find it is the most magical. Your friends and family realize that your life is changing. For example if you are trying to save money to pay off your debt, or save for a house etc., and you can’t go for dinners as often, or go out as frequently, your real friends will understand that, and not make you feel worse about it. Instead they will accommodate you in a way that you can still be included. My personal example is my fitness journey. I go to work Monday-Friday 9-5. I either go home and walk the dog, eat dinner and then go to the gym 7-9, or go to the gym right after work 5-7. My life is busy, and when I’m not at the gym or at work, I am either making food, walking my dog, doing laundry, or some other adult type task. I don’t drink much anymore, and I also never eat out because it doesn’t fit my macros (macro-nutrients – carbs, fat, protein). My real friends have understood that and have stood by me. Instead we hang out at one of our houses, or go for coffee, or go to the gym together.

4) You decided you weren’t happy and wanted to do something about it, that’s magic in itself.

Now, here is time for the disappointing things that happen when you decide to make a change in your life.

1) People who you thought actually wanted to see you succeed obviously do not, because they don’t in any way shape or form make an effort to show they give a shit or care about your progress. The funny thing about this situation that makes me laugh, is if my life was going to shit, they would “be there for me”, and text me everyday, but when my life is actually looking up, poof! They are gone. This behavior shows who your real friends are. Your real friends will want you to succeed. They will feel good from the fact that you are happy, and reaching your goals. Like people say:

“Misery Loves Company”

Some people just would prefer for you to stay average, and not reach your full potential, and shine like a diamond. Those people are not worth having in your life, because they are only going to bring you down. Ditch those people, and find people who encourage you to push yourself, find people who make you feel amazing, find people who love you when you’re failing miserably, and when you’re succeeding.

2) Your life gets stressful, no doubt. Sometimes you get so caught up in your goal that you forget that you have a life outside of it. I can admit 100% that I have done this a few times since December. I got so busy with my schedule that I didn’t text one of my friends for a week, and I felt awful. My friends are one of the reasons I am where I am today, and I don’t like when I get so preoccupied in my own life, that I forget about theirs. The upside of this though is your true friends will understand that, and not hold it against you. Try and remember though that there needs to be a balance, and sometimes it’s tricky finding that balance, but keep trying!

3) Your life can get somewhat boring sometimes. If you’re one that is trying to save money, you obviously won’t be doing as much because it costs money to do things. But try and remember, when it’s all over it will all be worth it 🙂 Keep your chin up ❤ Plus, your true friends will understand this, and will help make your life less boring!

Making changes is hard, even just thinking about making a change is hard, but remember at the end it will all be worth it. You will have your shit days where you will want to give up, and you’ll question why you even started pursuing this goal in the first place, but with the help of your true friends and family you will get through it. Remember, that shitty day will soon be over, and another day will come. You only live once, make it count, and be the best version of yourself you can be, and remember you’re the only person you have to live with, so make sure you put yourself first and that you’re happy. The right people will stick by your side, and you will soon learn which people weren’t actually your friends at all, because they are no where to be found.

Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, then it’s not the end – Ed Sheeran


3 thoughts on “How Pursuing My Goals Showed Me Who My Real Friends Are

  1. Hey Joanna ! Wow what a great article to read . It sounds like you are doing so well and big things are ahead of you !! This article motivates me to go after what I really want in life 🙂
    Ps. It’s Astrid from CDS . Glad your doing so well !


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